30 Things I’ve Learned by 30 (See Jane Turn 30)

29.

Much like the setting of a famous Charles Dickens novel, it was the best of times, it was the worst of times.  I’ll give 29 one thing, though: it forced me to grow up and face a lot of realities.  Today I turn 30 years old and it’s been quite a journey so far.  

1. I can’t believe I have a child.  Sometimes I feel like I’m still 16 years old…and babysitting.
2. On a related note, I’m the youngest of four kids and I’ve learned it that title carries on with you through life (maybe I feel 16 because I’m still treated like I’m 16…?).
3. The past five years have been a blur; it’s true that the older you get, the faster time flies.
4. I’ve really become comfortable in my own skin these past few years (i.e. I think I’m over getting that nose job).
5. You’re never too old to make new friends.  
6. …but don’t forget about the friends you’ve had in the past.  It’s inevitable that people change and grow apart but you never know when you’ll cross paths again.
7. All wine tastes the same to me.  Is my palette that unrefined?
8. Hangovers seem to get worse with each passing year.  Maybe it’s the cheap wine.
9. With a demanding job, new baby, family and life, it’s become increasingly hard to keep commitments and it’s something I try to work on everyday.
10. I always fancied myself a ‘go with the flow’ type, but I’m realizing I’m more uptight than I thought.
11. Learning about people firsthand by engaging with them is so much more interesting than making assumptions from afar.
12. I thought I’d be organized by now.  Nope, I still lose my phone every two minutes.
13. I’ve visited a lot of countries and I haven’t even scratched the surface; there are so many places I want to visit.
14. And if you get the chance, live or study abroad.
15. I feel extremely fortunate for my family and upbringing.  My parents provided the necessities, expected a lot, but us loved unconditionally.  Most importantly, they didn’t spoil us.
16. Even so, I hated chores growing up and still dread cleaning my house.
17. If your significant other also hates cleaning, do yourselves a favor and hire a cleaning service.  It could save your relationship.
18. You’re never too old for Disney movies.  When I catch Beauty and the Beast on TV, it’s like I’m 8 again.
19. I felt like I really started to get to know my parents as real people this past decade.  I love hearing stories about them from other people.
20. Don’t be afraid to make a risky career move in your 20s.  I left my well-paying, finance job (and survived the financial crash of 2008!) to sell men’s clothing at start-up with 20 employees and questionable wifi.  Three years later, I’m extremely proud of what I’ve helped build at Trunk Club.
21. Although it happens very infrequently, nothing beats a lazy day sunbathing (with SPF, of course).
22. Fashion is no reason to go into debt.  You don’t have to break the bank to look awesome. 
23. Expand your taste in music.  I can safely say that no matter what XM channel I listen to while driving, I will know a song.  (I’d be amazing at ‘Name That Tune.’)
24. Learn as much as you can.  Sometimes I think about how awesome it was to go to school everyday and learn something new–while breaking for lunch and recess.  But seriously, how great was that?  Man, we all really took that for granted.
25. It really does take a village to raise a child.  Having a baby and losing a parent all within months of each other was the hardest time of my life.  I’m eternally grateful for all the helping hands when it came to Harry–my own family and Eric’s included.  It wasn’t easy adjusting to life as a new parent while losing your own.
26. Being a working parent is really hard–much more difficult than I anticipated.  And mommy guilt is a real thing.
27. You have no clue about parenting until you have your own.  Expectations?  Throw those out the window.
28. Life isn’t fair.  Who knows why we’re given the hand we’re dealt?  I will never understand why my dad’s life was cut so short.
29. Always, always, always tell your loved ones how much they mean to you.  The last meaningful phone conversation I had with my dad (pre-hospital and pre-decline) was brief.  The regret I have is real and it consumes me; I can only hope that he knew how much I love him.
30. The aforementioned conversation was on my dad’s 66th birthday–about a week before he was hospitalized before his imminent decline.  The fact that he won’t be calling me today is hard to wrap my head around.  The most important thing I’ve learned was taught to me by my dad; he’d always say, ‘it’s ok to feel that way.’  It was somewhat a family motto growing up and has stuck with me throughout the years.  As I forge ahead into my 30s, with a baby in tow but without a father, I am certain I will bring his pearls of wisdom along for the ride.